Sunday 12 February 2012

The Riddle of a Fat Bint




Day in the life of a Fat Bint
So I have decided to make a note of day. Oh joy, the boringness…..
I got up early enough for a Saturday I think… 9 am isn’t too bad is it?
Meh, maybe it is. Feck it. Just being doing the usual stuff of cleaning up the reptiles, sorting out the dogs and checking me emails once I was done with that stuff. Today has been with the help of my awesome mister Stuart  He has had 2 days off this weekend so it has been awesome to have a hand in the household things 
The dogs were, as usual, hyper as hell so I had to run after them. Pfft that’s normal 
My lizards were hyper, which I have been pleased for. My male bearded dragon has been slow and he has not been eating at all lately. He was so bad he lost weight very noticeably and got sooooo weak  I have got him eating properly and being himself now so my worry there has eased 
So once we got the zoo sorted I got on with making some soup. Proper home made soup. Here is my favourite recipe (In England)-
Get 6 large carrots
1 large turnip/Swede
1 large onion
1-2 leeks (depending on size)
6 large potatoes
dumpling mix (optional)
Pack of red lentils
Pack of Broth Mix
Joint of meat, or bits of meat

This is how I did it (UK recipe)
Put meat in a large pan covered in water no matter what it is.
Boil for 30-40 mins
In that time prepare the veg, cut up all the veg named above if you want it in, and miss what ya don’t. Keep some turnip and carrot (if you like) and grate those up. This has been passed down to me and I love it but add or take away where needs be.
After 40min chop up meat into as many pans ya want.
Fill each pan with water. Add a quarter cup of red lentils.
Slow boil for 15-20 mins
stir occasionally
After about 20 mins add the broth mix
Slow boil that for 20 mins
After 20 mins start to add veg, start with potatoes. Give them 10 mins then add the rest of the veg.
Simmer for 20 mins then add the veg you grated. Give that 5 mins and if you want add dumplings using a dumpling mix of your choice
Simmer for 20 mins – 40 mins
Add a little salt and pepper to taste
Sorted with some buttered bread 

That was my morning pretty much. When I was waiting I have been messing on with my games workshop army and taking pics of what I have done. I been gaming with Stu, my mister on Space Marine online and watching movies and tv with him :D We both have had a shitload of drink, I blame us both there lol.
Tonight though, I have been stereotyped for being a fat bird. Yet again I have to defend anyone big 
I am fat, therefore I MUST LOVE MCDONALDS AND BURGER KING AND KFC and whatever shite like that.
I ain’t had that shite in so long I can’t remember. Does Yo Sushi count as fast food, we love that 
I am fat so I must be thick as pig shit.  (damn I should stop wanting to study molecular biology, genetics, geophysics, particle physics)  am fat so I can’t use my brain 
I am fat so I am fucking ugly
On the note of being considered ugly and the fact that I am fat, I am easy, Us big girls need love too you know. I am fat so I will fuck anything apparently. I have a live chat show or chat room on a webcam site and I HAVE TO see your wang. If I say anything against it I am a fat fuck and us fat bints can’t get any kinda sex cos we are fat and we love nothing but fast food and cake
Or we are lezzers
I like girls as much as men, my mister loves that fact 
I hate cake
Unless the fast food is sushi it can fuck off
I love to walk daily and when I can’t walk I dance and weight lift
No, I will not sit on you, I will not engage in your insane fetish
I have been asked the meaning of ALL my tattoos. Really… Do I have to? Can’t you accept that they have meaning to me? Or do you believe that they only mean as much as scars depending on the scars. Some scars can be soul deep and not visible to you 


I am fat, I am considered ugly because of that or anyways, I won’t change, I am me so FUCK OFF 

Deal with it